CAN I BE BY YOUR SIDE??

Monday, October 30, 2006

im sad to the max ppl...klah not to the max but im just very sad.. i heard a very depressing news frm my fren well of course about teddy.. sorry ppl that i keep in talking about teddy.. its just dat since its my blog i have to write about my real feelings.. i cant express this to anione else in proper except with my frens of course.. aniways i duno how to say it.. im scared that teddy will noe that im talking abt him.. okae aniway! im sad that i got to noe that teddy might leave me.. im so damn sad after knowing that he might wan to go and leave me.. please dun leave me teddy.. i will miss u badly if u leave me.. haiz!

but its just a small probability that he will go.. but still.. kat's fren said that i shud just support him with his decision.. yar hes true that i have to support him lah but still its better that he just stay..

okae! tata!

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
11:24 PM;

Saturday, October 28, 2006

hehe! hello ppl... i actually didnt plan to update my blog.. but im just bored so i just update sth lah.. aniways today i had pw in sch! WTH?! its saturday but i still have to go sch.. no life seh.. but wat to do for pw sake.. i really wanna score well for it.. cmon ar.. we put in so much efforts.. okae! stop talking abt sch..

so wat am i supposed to talk about??errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr............ okae.. ytd i went to watch a 150 inch "life TV".. hehe.. i bet u duno wat im talking about rite.. (its a secret code)..
aniways.,after had a chat with kat's fren hafis, i tink hes rite.. so datz y im nt as moody as the previous post.. i shud just take things slowly.. okae!

for rayer, i wan to go out with all my frens frm innova, my bitchalisation sisters, band frens and also my pri sch frens.. but i dunoe whether i can cover everyone in time.. but of course i will like to go to teddy's hse for rayer... hehe! i just hope we can go jln rayer together2.. looking forward to it..

nxt week will be a damn busy week for me.. 'A' level mother tongue and also pw.. hopefully i will be free by nxt2 week.. cos i want to jln rayer with my booboo frens.. i lap them! and of course teddy..hehe! and i alsowanna go sentosa.. i wan to swim.. long time seh nvr go swim.. wen was the last time i went out to go swim? cant remember actually.. i really wanna go sentosa..with errr...if gt teddy will be better actually.. but if other frens oso can.. pls!!

kkkkk....bye2! tata!

p.s: please tag my blog anione..im so bored..pls talk to me..hehe..even if i duno u..booboo!

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
6:06 AM;

Thursday, October 26, 2006

haiz.. im just feeling very sad today.. dunoe how to explain it to ppl but its just a feeling that me myself couldnt even understand. is it about teddy? ppl, am i thinking of teddy too much? i noe its nt a good sign as it seems as though im obsessed with him.. im not obsessed over him k? its just dat at this point of time i tink i really nid sumone by my side.. and i can see teddy as the perfect candidate for it.. im not up for perfection..im ook with anything.. well cmon..im a person who gives chance very easily..cause i believe in it.. aniway, where was i? okae.. i just think im feeling very down lately maybe because im thinking about this.. ppl may think im happy wen i see teddy..well of course im very happy..but i cant do much.. i cant go infront of him and just confess it straight to his face.. im not dat type of person.. i rather want it to be natural even without any hint from anyone to him. i noe i might be fighting a losing battle or wat ever it is lah.. i noe its useless to create high hopes wen its obvious that i cant achieve it.. look at the state im at now.. but i still thank GOD for the blessings that i received.. im promoted to JC2.. well done lydia!
aniways, back to where i stopped.. actually im on no mood to continue.. will update soon! sorry pppl...im not my usual self.. i really want my cheerful-ness to cum back..im sure the old lydia will cum back soon.. till then, i will try to sort out my feelings and my wants.. bye..

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
6:48 AM;

Sunday, October 22, 2006

hello.. tmr will be the eve of hari rayer..yippee!! i cant wait to celebrate it with my new batch of frens from JC.. i am looking forward to all the nice food that i can eat..yippee!!! well, i only wish for me going jln rayer with teddy meddy and frens.. i really want to be ard him.. im gonna freaking miss him so much.. and i do hope we can really get together for the rayer outing..

aniways, last thurs i buke-ed out with kat and her fren.. his name is Hafis..(ermm i duno if it is being spelled like that).. aniways we had a good talk with each other.. and i actually told him abt teddy meddy.. i cant help it..he knows teddy meddy well and he is the person hu noes him better than anione else.. he gave me wonderful advices to go on with teddy meddy.. however, he also said i shudnt hope so much.. haiz.. i tink hes rite.. i shudnt hope so much.. cmon lydia..he doesnt even notice gerls ard him..hes simply in his own world.. haiz.. i will be hurting myself if i really hope so much frm him.. haiz.. sometimes i wonder wat is going thru his head.. i really want to noe wat he feels abt me.. but.. the best way now is to just keep it low and steady.. no matter wat i will persevere till the end like wat i did for the guy that i used to like...(jannah will noe it).. haiz.. i duno whether to feel sad or happy..
i seriously tink that i like teddy meddy alot..i cant help thinking abt him for almost every min.. i will always find ways to be able to watch teddy meddy in sch.. im gonna miss him so much during the sch hols...haiz.. but aniways, i will try my best to calm my feelings down and not be too hopeful..

sometimes, i shud just face the reality and stop dreaming... im not being a pessimist, but im doing it for my own good...haiz...

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
5:52 AM;

Saturday, October 21, 2006

well...on the 14th of october, my school had an open house. truthfully, its kinda boring...i duno whether our school is too big for the whole sch population or there were only few hu turned up for the open house.. hehe.. i did performed with the sch band playing my lovely double bass...it was very boring.. but i had fun walking ard the sch and watching teddy in action at the grand stand.. i like to see my teddy meddy.. aniways, i duno wat else to say..yippee!!!

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
5:22 AM;

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

i want alot of stuffs....and i want to do alot of stuffs too......yippee!in the top of my list will be me getting promoted to JC2...

1. i want teddy!!!!!!
2. a white or pink dress..
3. i want TEDDY and HIM to be promoted and of course my classmates... (please...)
4. i want red or orange jacket..
5. i want new bag..
6. i want new shoes....normal sneakers will do..
7. i want teddy to talk to me.. (oh please..)
8. i want to go out wif teddy...(jln rayer)
9. bring teddy to siti's open house....(hopefully)

it is not in any order...its just sumthings that i really really want.. yippee! hopefully can do it by this year.....tata!

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
11:25 PM;

Monday, October 16, 2006

teddy got SEXY legs...yippee! this is my sexy teddy... hehehehehe... im not supposed to c but i just did....hahaha! and he also fell down..alah cute nyer... teddy always like to fall2 rite..hehehe! go sexy teddy... I PASSED MY LIT...finally!!! hopefully the tablet pc is mine...muahaha!

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
1:10 AM;

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Kci & JoJo - All My Life

my all time favourite song.. tis is cool shit..
u shud check out the lyric..its so damn nice...if anyone can dedicate tis song to me, wouldnt it be nice? haiz....ok lah.. njoy it k?

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
11:16 PM;

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you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
6:42 AM;

im so sorry... i didnt mean to say all that.. it was just sth in a fit of anger... im sorry k?

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
5:34 AM;

Friday, October 06, 2006

Give it up to me

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
9:03 PM;

im so damn happy dat exams have finally over... no more stress, late nights, scratching of head, frownings, coffee and flipping thru my notes.. now i can get back my beauty sleep..hehe..watever!

i duno y? but is dis fate or just purely coincidence? i have been seing u practically everywhere..well of cuz not inside the washroom..haha! but really everywhere.. places dat i nvr expected u to be there.. i really am glad feeling this way, teddy meddy.. u amke me smile whenever i see u..
atleast it doesnt spoil my mood.. some ppl think im just a tranparent glass wat? well... let me say this..I DUN GIVE A DAMN ANIMORE! ppl treat me like shit..then i will treat u back like shit too.. no point trying to be nice... based on what i learn frm literature, there is such a term as karma.. well...do all u want to me.. all the bad stuffs and im sure u will get it back one day..probably not by me.. just hope that sum ppl will realise.. grow up man! u are not matured enuff..coward! self centred freak....!watever k? grow up before u even realise wat ure doing lah...

aniway..stop wif all this nonsense.. im just trying to cool myself..so sorry guys..lets get back to teddy..well ntg much to say.. aniting special i will update k ppl..
p.s: if u feel as though im talking abt u..well...feel k? cuz ure the people who will feel guilty abt it...

bye! yuh ok! luv u teddy meddy...oppss! did i just say dat? well hu crres! hehe!

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
6:52 AM;

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

hiya!!! i luv u guys out there!!! i duno y but i just feel so happie today.... thank you kat! without her i wun be this happie.. OMG! i must thank GOD for fulfiling wat ive been wishing for..

i will talk more later k? aniway starting from now onwards i must blog abt my teddy abit more secretive cos....he might be reading tis blog sooner or later...hehe..cos...dowan to say cos later he noe im talking abt him...shud i say? well i talked to him oredi....we talked a lot of crap but we still talk..and that makes me happy....

so...now...i wanna express my concerns to all gerls out there... just beware of guys that can easily lead you on....okae...after seeing my fren got hurt so bad and also experienced it myself...i really have to say tis ar.. find the guy that will really treasure u the most no matter how bad u look like..its all based on your character and not just look....get to noe the guy well before even try to like him...

peace out ppl!!

you are a priority..dun make me ur option instead
6:26 AM;